Guilty on a Sunday!

A Sunday looks beautiful traditionally, when spent buying fresh flowers, having breakfast in bed, a long soak in the bath, curling up on the sofa to read a book, baking a cake, a walk along the river, a yoga class, an afternoon of dancing around your living room to your favourite music...etc.

Its a day to indulge in guilty pleasures. Everybody has them perhaps.I have a handful too.
At the top of my list is to do nothing, while I sit in my balcony and look at the sky. Honestly, I am doing this more often for therapeutic reasons. The sky has supernatural powers. One who does this, certainly already knows it. If I add a wine to the mix it's even better.I love reading books. Anytime. Passionate love stories and middle east complicated love, in particular-  are my favourite. 

I don't know how I built a taste for them. I think I have a handsome collection there.

Those who know me, clearly know that one of my biggest pleasures is have hearty, sometimes honest, philosophical chats...with the couple of closest I have. Iam a different person with them. I thank god for you guys.

I love my blog. It is an outlet for me to share fun things Iam thinking and  it makes me happy to share my happy thoughts.When you have two young children hanging out with friends, almost always, becomes a guilty pleasure.  I love the time I get to hang out with friends; whether its for dinner, happy hour, a phone chat, or a stay over.Sunday for me becomes a difficult day of the week.As some people say, anticipation of what lies ahead can be much worse than the real thing—which, in this case, is the week ahead. On Saturday, you're all gung ho about the weekend, but as the hours creep further and further into Sunday, you get a case of what's been dubbed "the Sunday scaries." What do you have going on this coming week? Are you ready? How can you prepare yourself for the five days of work ahead?Me. I wish to unplug from the internet this week perhaps.. Take a break from scrolling on social media or obsessively typing down my thoughts and enjoy the moment— or one of these other low-tech activities.I'd love to know what you're guilty pleasures are.  What do you do to survive the stress? The work week?  The crabby kids? etc?

Why I adore the night!

There is no comfort from the sky like those times when the night is slowly covered in a dark blanket and littered with twinkling stars. 
Night is a time of reflection. It’s private liberation…when I can own the world around me…in solitary comfort.
Thoughts, feelings, walks, dreams, love, slowness, time, quiet, books, seasons – all these things, which are not really things, but moments of life – take on a different meaning at night-time, where the moon emerges from the diminishing light of the sun, and we have time to reflect what life is to us, knowing that it passes, and that every bit of it, in its change and its difference, is the here and now of what we have.

Some nights, I remember my stays in my little hometown in kerala. The sky looks dazzling and mostly you are treated to the perfect dance of a million twinkling stars.

To me the night is very deep and the moon is magic. Life is too short to be all daylight. Night is not less; it's more.

Dear Disney..I love Moana💃

Ever watch children's movies..when you weren't a child anymore?

Let me start by saying I’m a real movie buff.

 I cannot think of anything better than snuggling with my kids anytime during the day, with lots of enthusiasm and drama in hand.  

As they get older, this experience is now saved more than often for the weekends but I still absolutely love it!

 Disney movies are the best, and they are definitely not just for children. They are full of inspirational and motivational quotes to help you reach for the stars and inspire your everyday life.

Children's films appeal to kids and adults alike for a reason: Each one is complete with impressive animation, clever characters, hilarious one-liners, and heartwarming stories. 
Are you like me and you’ve seen the Disney movie Moana a million times?
I'm currently obsessed with the theme song to this movie, so powerful.
Iam super impressed with Moana, Grandma Tala, and Maui!
I took my son to see it in the theaters not long after it came out and I loved it.  We’ve watched it a few times since then and it’s a movie that we can all enjoy together as a family. 

Moana is a movie about an adventurous teenager who sails out on a daring mission to save her people. The inspiring story of a girl from the Pacific Islands who partnered with the demigod Maui to restore the heart of a goddess has captured the heart of many.

Moana should be your mindset coach. 

We wound up with Moana in our movie collection by accident. Eventually we probably would have bought it on purpose since we plan to get all of the princess movies, but it was not high on our list at the moment. Nothing against Moana, but we had been focusing on collecting all of the Marvel and Star Wars movies for awhile since that’s what my son is into at the moment.

Anyway, Moana wound up in our collection thanks to my girly love for the Disney Movie Club. It’s the best outcome of my fandom in a long time. Maybe ever, I can’t remember. (Ha. Get it?)

I love this movie. I adore this movie. I want to watch this movie everyday and make everybody watch it. Everyone. Young, old, man, woman, dog, cat, everyone.

I was watching it the other day with my family and decided it was time to write a blog post and tell all of you why you need to watch this movie. I can’t let it go anymore because Moana is too right on target for my message

Live like Moana.

I highly recommend picking up the Moana soundtrack too. The music is fun- my 4 year old loves dancing to it- but it is also filled with really empowering messages.

Life along the rail tracks!

Haven't we all, once in our life, travelled in trains.

Besides getting chatty with friends and relatives who come to see us off, watching co- travellers or strangers across platforms...varying anything from people enjoying meals, to beggars asking for alms, exuberant children with exhausted  parents ..or the woman in the purple clothes who is exceptionally catchy...surfing the book stall especially magazines, comics or sundry pickables..to sipping on the irresistible chai from the mobile chaiwalla...we even dont mind catching up on lost sleep where our baggage doubles up as a head rest. 

Talking about chai... in the stations of kerala, I particularly have an eye for the seasoned 'pazham pori'. It's a delicious evening banana snack.

In all these years, my favourite indulgence on railway platforms is without doubt, brooding, contemplating and ruminating. Thinking deeply about life left unattended..revisiting past events to give them a second chance in my head or the favourite one always... dreaming about what could be.

My favourite thought is ..rail journeys are always about ..going home. It's nostalgic. I hope I take more such trips and it brings me most of what I wish for..

What are you looking for!

As I sit here next to my window

with a tea cup between my palms

a bunch of pages on my table

I stared outside for 10 mins

it's sunny weather

trees are still and bored

the sky's blue

with clouds that look like cotton balls covering patches in the sky

I sometimes forget about this

i am contented with what I have

freedom and good health is a beautiful thing

I thought, it's important to take a minute

and I just appreciate what I have

just sit there and breathe.

Write it down and Let it go!

I don’t understand the “motivation” part. When an idea comes to me, I have to grab whatever writing tool I have and start writing it. It can come anytime, anywhere. I could be out walking, when a sentence comes to me, and I’d know it’s something because I’d practically want to write it down. I hope I always have something to write on handy.  And it’s just this creative energy from there. I think what usually blocks this kind of creative energy is when I might be more concerned about the technical process, the do’s, the dont’s, or techniques. 

Great if Iam in "my favorite place", but... if imagination and notes strike... I must get 'em down.  Paper... Napkin... computer screen... phone--all of it + any of it.

Just get it DONE.  :)

To be true, on my bed, facing the full length windows overlooking the balcony and the skyline, (whatever is visible from the 21st level) is my usual go to place.

Nevertheless, to be honest on most days, I usually sit at my dining room table, so I can keep an eye on everyone.

So how do you never lose a perfect shower line again.  Iam still finding out.

The real writer experience is standing in the shower and coming up with the most authentic dialogue with perfect phrasing and raw emotion in your head, then stepping out and drying your hair, putting on some clean pajamas and opening a word document to write down all your perfect ideas only to realize everything has evaporated. 

When there's a lot in my mind it helps me get me thoughts straight and organized. And yes, I love writing in my kitchen. It has a nice big window. I need to see outdoors when writing, might distract me at times but also no one interrupts me there..

What are you waiting for...start now, record your extraordinary life!

My little ray of sunshine☀

We are right in the middle of May and while some of us might be heads down at the office already, some are probably finding their minds wandering aimlessly, this time of year.

Most friends I talk to, have a default reaction to any news about the virus these days i.e. to ponder, build momentary anxiety and  then to get back to work. For many others, whose family members have to step out to work everyday, it is pure fright day in and day out. 

 Being resilient in the face of a crisis is a complicated game. Not for ones like me. I worry a lot. But then, without a sense of humor and entertainment, I begin to feel lost. I found the medicine to my pandemic induced baseless overthinking. When people at home wonder about the time I spend on spiritual reading and endless writing, I figured I can blame the coronavirus for all of the time it has given me to reflect, dream and fantasize about my future, how I will make up for everything lost and carry the dreams forward with a multiplying effect.

 

 Yes most likely, Iam, like  most of you, daydreaming of the same place--the beach, the hills or the green tropical forest camps.

While in the present tense each morning,  nothing beats stepping out of a warm shower and settling down to writing post completion or yet, my imaginative accomplishment of household chores.

While the unending lockdown has already spoilt our mood in terrible ways with all the time spent away from our now supremely valued physical freedom and social relations, things look exciting to me when I read how some people stay level headed and enjoy their little holidays in the balcony.

I figured I can use the time and get my little garden pots in shape. And at other times, when the sun goes down, grab a moment, listen to music and imagine myself on a beach.

The rolling waves, the warm sun, the salt smell, the sand under my feet, the beach represents the ultimate in relaxation for many of us.

But why is that? Why does this one particular kind of place call to us in such an irresistible way? 

Very tough though, I must say, to stay in that momentum, with hubby on office calls round-the-clock and the kids beating the hell out of my limited patience.

I rest in the promise that I may not be able to travel now, but I can derive most of my joy from the process of planning a trip anyway. 

And for those of us, again this includes also me, who look at even taking a happy walk to the neighbourhood grocery store or random park visits a far fetched occurrence, I feel I am living hell each day.

 I can't stress enough, how much I worry and build up on my anxiety by imagining this has no end day. Fortunately, the Mr, is a good samaritan and redirects me to my spiritual glass, which I comically have great difficulty in holding on to.

Eventually, I survive each day by knowing for sure, that each day will pass and I must maintain a rhythm and routine for each day.  One that can really fill me up and give me a hopeful sense about life ahead.

Nostalgia and eagerness, crazy times!

The aim is to be respectful and smart and safe. I miss the outdoors and yeah, the colours of my city, Mumbai…but I am doing my part to keep our community safe, and only going out, for reasons unavoidable. And ofcourse the ones who have to attend to work, with the face mask on. I miss the smell of overworked fuel on the road, walking past people stretched on the packed pathways and giving people way to go first, the honking of cars, people randomly standing to stop autos, the courier boys, the maids sitting around, exchanging greetings with fellow morning walkers, beautiful boys and girls in their playwear, nannies with little ones under the shades of trees, and meditation seekers sitting in the grass letting the sun warm their face.
For now, I believe deep breaths and open windows will give me a boost.
I’ve made a habit of scrolling through my Instagram profile every night, thinking about how bizarre it is that I was standing near my friends whenever I wanted to only a month ago. It already feels impossible that I used to enter restaurants with abandon, drink a margarita with friends and read a book and eat whatever iteration of potato the menu is serving, on the days I went on solo dates.
Someday, I will probably once again tell a friend a secret over a third glass of wine—in person, not over phone. It’s something I have done with an overseas friend several times without really planning to, but now nostalgia is making me want to do it on purpose.
I daydream about the next manicure, pedicure, and all those pampering treatments.
Maybe I would like to stay at home on my bed and write notes all day, but when I have to do it, it is not fun anymore. I lost the feeling that Iam the one who decides where and when I want to be.
I miss that freedom and am thinking of the day I can do my travels again. Yes, destinations with sea views, warm morning sun, and magnificent sunsets.
And that is why this summer is going to be the summer of my life. I will enjoy it more than ever. Every minute of every day. Because I feel it’s going to be real soon.
Perhaps my wishes are not cancelled, only postponed. That classic glass of wine is waiting for me, with my name on it, in some jazzy restaurant.
Will meet soon.

Tropical pursuits...

It is one thing to walk into a star hotel, being greeted with cold towels, strings of fresh jasmine draped around our necks, and sandalwood paste on our foreheads as a sign of welcome before receiving a fresh coconut… all while flower petals rained down on us from above. Is this real life?!

In this tropical Paradise, I have spent my childhood summer vacations watching the sun rise over rice fields filled with lotuses and watched it set among the palm trees.

It is no secret to anyone that knows me, even marginally well, that I love the sea.I have always been a true blue beach bum by heart (Okay I absolutely love the Jungles too). But, to stay on topic – I love the beach. Period.

There is a relief when I am around salt water. My stress drains out, my senses come alive, and I can block everything else out. ( the sea need not be your thing, any other kind of place that one can go to put the world on pause for a little while and just be alone with one’s thoughts and the sounds around.) It is where I long to go when I am craving to be away from responsibilities and weighing expectations.

It is where I go when I feel like I need to creatively recharge. It is my escape and should I ever decide I want to run away from home, it would not be very difficult for those who love me to locate me. On a lighter note, my personal GPS would guide me there when I need it most. It is where I can just be.

My husband knows (and expects) that there will be a day at the end of each summer or early autumn where I beg to pack up and head off for the routine unsurprising visit. I bring my simple notebook and a pen. I bring my thoughts. And, I sit for a few hours.

There’s something about the beach that always lures me in. Maybe it is the empty open spaces filled with blues. Or maybe it is the sound of the waves challenging the shore each time. Maybe it is the alluring dance of the beautiful coconut trees.

The big vast waters, the beach lined with trees, and the stretch of nothingness brings me enough calm.

Looking forward to the next visit.

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Stranger in the store..

The sound of the bell above the door, broke the calm silence that had taken over the shop, startling you from your peaceful haze. Lifting your gaze from your book, you smiled as you saw a familiar figure entering, desperately ignoring the way your heart fluttered at the sight of them.

They had been visiting your store for almost a year now, at first only coming in every other week to peruse the antiques and oddities. The two of you instantly hit it off however, thanks to your mutual love for the obscure and macabre, and before either of you even realised it, they were coming in almost every day.

In all honesty, they had started to become your favourite part of your day, and seeing them never failed to bring a smile to your face, no matter how short their visit or how dark your mood.

Giggles spilled easily from your lips as they all but skipped over to your counter, the grin on their face telling you that they had a new joke to tell you today. They were always excited when they had something new to show you, be it some bizarre trinket or specimen, or even a morbid joke, the likes of which few, other than they and yourself, found entertaining.

They enjoyed having someone who shared their strange tastes and sense of humour, and you enjoyed the way they’d lit up your life, chasing away the loneliness that had coloured so much of it. When it was just the two of you like this, you almost felt like the world wasn’t such a horrible place, though you’d sworn to yourself that you wouldn’t tell them.

You knew that one day a time would come that they’d leave you behind too, but until that day, you fully intended to relish in the joy and laughter they’d brought into your dreary life.

For that… you would forever be grateful.

Coffee by the window...

Have you ever been to have a coffee by yourself?
A book cafe maybe..
I used to…a lot…in my younger days…

There was a particular cafe in Chennai, those days, I used to frequent with my book. It was an upmarket place and no one really paid attention to my permanent spot,located in a corner, on most evenings.
The cafe has particular significance in my mind because that is where i first saw, my husband.
My favourite spot used to be just by the window. I used to love how the light hits the gigantic splotchy glass early in the mid-mornings and late evenings….and how watching people was so darn therapeutic.

Mostly I used to occupy the seat by the glass windows and look out. Look at all the people walking in and out of the mall. All the girls with one too many shopping bags. All the couples too in love to care. Then you’ll see it slowly— a bit of yourself in everyone. And somehow, sitting alone in a coffee shop had never felt so good.

Longing to do that again.